Wow. It’s all so overwhelming – and that’s just the hormones! Reality is beyond overwhelming! We left it with heading to the hospital, so let’s pick up there…
We got to the hospital and got checked in without too many problems. I think I was practically shaking with nerves and anticipation. I had all my lists of phone numbers and info, but of course had forgotten some of the details on the pediatrician. Thank God they could look them up there – I was already feeling like a total failure as a parent! I got checked into the room and in the gown and they set up the monitor. The nurse looked at the monitor and said – hmm, do you feel that? You’re actually having contractions now. What?! But contractions are a big deal. They hurt a lot and you’d definitely know. I mean, I feel something now – is that it? But I thought that was indigestion / heartburn! Seriously? I seriously thought it was heartburn. I thought that was just something they said in bad movies. I mean - how, on earth, could one possibly confuse the two? I’d never confusing my (blindingly painful) menstrual cramps with indigestion. And labor is much worse than cramps.
Anyway, I’m sure it was all just early labor, but it did make me feel a bit better about the induction. In the last week, I’d started worrying about an early eviction. What if she wasn’t ready to come? Should I be induced at all? I know it’s dangerous to wait too long, but still… but some early labor had me thinking – ok, it’s time and she knows it too.
The on call doctor came in around 10:30 or so to administer the Cervidill. I don’t know exactly what the stuff is, but basically it looks like a shoelace on which there’s some drug or other. They put that in your birth canal to try to “ripen” your cervix and get you dilated (as I was less than 1 cm dilated) before they start pitocin. Having the Cervidill put in was EXTREMELY uncomfortable! I mean – it really hurt. The doctor wasn’t very gentle and all that, but still – now I was scared. I mean, the baby was hardly going to be “gentle” and she was FAR LARGER than a shoestring! Labor might just break me in two if this stupid thing hurt that much!!
The nurse came in after and offered me some Ambien, which I gladly took (like I was going to sleep at all without it!). I managed to go to sleep ok, but woke up around 3 with that same “indigestion” I’d been having the last several nights. I now knew that this was likely labor, but I also knew that a Tylenol had taken care of it the last few nights and let me sleep… the problem was I knew the nurses wouldn’t give me a Tylenol to ease my labor pains – and if I told them I was having any, we’d have to go down the road of all sorts of check ups that I knew I didn’t really need (this was no worse than yesterday). I also knew I probably shouldn’t take one of my own Tylenol (as sorely tempting as that was!) because I’d have to worry about drug interactions. So I just lay there – waiting… listening to the hospital noises… listening to my husband snoring… anticipating.