Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Being Cultural

We finally both had a day off last week – a day off where we didn’t have to house hunt (even though ours keeps getting delayed) and didn’t have to move (nowhere to go!) and didn’t have a thousand errands to run! So we decided to go have some fun. The original plan had been to go to Annapolis, but the weather wasn’t nearly as nice as we’d hoped, so we decided to go the Chesapeake Bay Maritime Museum in St. Michael’s, MD. We figured we could get our fix of being near the water if the weather was nice, but didn’t have to stand around in the cold by the water if it wasn’t.

As it turns out, the museum is actually multiple buildings (and outdoor exhibits!) on the water, so we were outside quite a bit. We’d dressed the munchkin in a long sleeved pink onesie (an adorable one my friend sent that says “does this diaper make my butt look big?”) and overalls with pink patches. But as it was cold, we threw a sweatshirt on her – a maroon BC sweatshirt that my sister in law bought (for equal opportunity college fashions, though she has gotten her FAR MORE VT stuff). I figured she had enough pink on, but in the baby bjorn (or daddy bjorn as my husband likes to call it), you could only see the jeans and maroon sweatshirt, so everyone kept asking us about our son. Oh no! I’m cross dressing her already! Just add this one to the therapy bills…

The museum was actually pretty interesting and more extensive than you’d think. We learned a bit about the history of the Bay and how fishing has changed. OK, maybe that doesn’t sound so interesting… but fishing was really a way of life, so it has far reaching impacts there. Anyway, afterward, we walked around the town a little and had an early dinner and stopped to get some ice cream on the way back to our car (I don’t know why I have been obsessed with getting ice cream this summer. I don’t know if it’s just the breastfeeding uber-hunger or what, but I’ve been eating a lot of ice cream!). The young woman working at the shop noticed our munchkin and told us she’d just found out she was expecting. Except she didn’t say it with the enthusiasm that you usually hear. My husband was mid-way through saying congratulations, as I watched her face and wasn’t sure congratulations were really what she wanted. She went on to explain that she was 22 and trying to go to college part time and that her boyfriend was completely overwhelmed by the news.

It’s so crazy when you think about it. I remember in my mid-20’s when my first friend started trying for a baby. It actually took her almost no time (though she thought 3 months felt like a long time), but it was so strange to hear her disappointment in not getting pregnant each month when so many other people I knew were trying for exactly the opposite at that time. Obviously several years later the tables have turned – concerns about pregnancy among my friends tend to be more fertility issues (we had our own such issues for over a year), so it was so ‘odd’ to hear someone unhappy about a pregnancy when that is all so many people I know want. Fate has a funny sense of humor, doesn’t she?

As I listened to this girl, I just wanted to give her a hug and run to buy her some diapers (or some baby thing) at the store (though my husband told me it was too early and that wasn’t appropriate). My husband told her that having a baby had totally changed everything in his life – entirely in good ways and tried to be encouraging (though he did have to give his typical speech warning her that the first 3 days were crazy hard!). But it was hard to watch her pain and fear (at least easier now that we have overcome our fertility issues to have our baby) and my heart went out to her. So I put this one out to the universe – to pray for this girl (and her ‘twins’ who are all over, facing the same situation).

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