Monday Minute - apparently the gross out edition...

So Jen from http://www.adailyscoopofchaos.com/ is hosting the Monday Minute this week (instead of Ian at the Daily Dose of Reality), but back from vacation and ready to play along!

Here goes:

1. Can you burp the ABC's?

No. My husband is proud of his burp talking abilities. It causes many a "discussion" about whether or not I'm willing to respond to comments burped at me. I've ALMOST gotten him to stop. At least when talking to me.

2. So lets just say you have a 9+ hour drive ahead of you would you consider wearing Depends so you didn't have to stop multiple times?

It didn't work on the baby on last week's 9+ hour drive, I doubt it will work on me.

OK, seriously - no. Theoretically, I guess you could be OK peeing like that with the fabric to "wick" away your pee, but if you have to poop, can you imagine the nasty diaper rash? So now I'm using depends and desitin? Great...

Also, I've discovered that my potty training was well enough instilled that I'm really not able as an adult to pee in inappropriate situations. I did one of those river float things a few years ago and was DYING to go - I thought my bladder would burst! I knew everyone else was going in the river, but I had such a hard time getting over the mental hurdle of going fully dressed in a river that people swim in. Separately, I was in the hospital a few years ago and was brought a bedpan and had the same issue. I looked at the nurse and said, I know I said I had to go, but I can't seem to do this - and awaited her wrath at my ridiculousness (didn't I "have" to go?). Instead she was really kind and looked at me and said - of course you can't. You're not used to wetting the bed.

So, long story short, I don't think it would work.

Oh, and EW!

3. Would you rather...run your tongue down five feet of a NYC street or press your tongue into a strangers nostril?

Ah, the fear factor edition. So do I get to see the street first (can I choose my own) and/or see the stranger first? I guess if totally forced, I'd probably "prefer" the nostril, as that could just take a second v. the street thing taking ALL DAY (the way I'd do it...). But the street thing is probably "more hygenic" (on the scale of 0-10, 0 being a sterilized lab and 10 being a petrie dish, it's probably a 122 v. the nostril thing being a 200?) because how long can germs live outside the body?

Hmm... maybe I need to rethink. Just making the decision might take ALL DAY.

4. If you had an envelope that contained the date you would die would you open it?

If I've completed #3, isn't this a moot point?

5. Which one song describes your sex life best?

Well, let's see we just went on vacation with our baby where our "suite" hotels were actually just a bedroom with a completely attached sitting room. We'd put her down in the crib and then sit very quietly in the dark until she stopped crying (read: I fell asleep at about 8:30 many nights). I don't think I want to answer the question this week!